Saturday, December 03, 2005

gue bangga sama lo

“lo gak takut sama gue?” begitu kata seorang sahabat ketika dia –akhirnya- bercerita tentang sebagian dari kisahnya. “gak semua orang lho bisa nerima product reject kaya gue”. Tambahnya lagi.

Terus terang ketika gue dulu pertama kali dengar kisahnya, yang pertama kali gue rasakan adalah sedih, membayangkan betapa lamanya dia harus bertahan dengan rahasianya itu dan berbohong kepada kebanyakan orang. Termasuk gue. Pengen rasanya saat itu teriak, “kenapa lo gak cerita ama gue dari dulu?” “why cant you accept me as your friend and share your burden with me?” Sampai sekarang, gue masih suka bertanya-tanya tentang itu. Mungkin gue bisa menebak-nebak satu atau dua alasannya, tapi I just know that the whole story would remain silent. Perhaps.

Kebanyakan orang memang akan memandang sinis dengan cerita sahabat gue itu. Gak mau munafik, mungkin jika kita ketemu waktu gue masih sma misalnya, gue juga kayanya bakal menghindar. Tapi hari gini? Masih maen diskriminasi-diskriminasian? Gile kali yeee… Lagyan, menurut salah satu ajaran yang gue pelajari dari dia, semakin lo menghindar, semakin lo akan kena dan kena lagi dengan masalah yang sama. So, lets face it!

Ketika dia bertanya seperti itu, gue hanya menjawab simple doang, “nggak lah, kenapa musti takut?” padahal yang pengen gue jawab itu lebih dari sekedar gtu doang. Emang dasar nih gue sedari kuliah udah terbiasa untuk mencela dan gak biasa buat memuji or say something serious. Jadi gue jawab dari sini aja kali ye biar lebih jelas dan clear.

Gue gak takut sama lo. Gue malah bersyukur sekali bisa ketemu sama lo dan belajar banyak dari lo. Sebanyak2nya (Pasti lo tau banget gue nulis ini sambil kelilipan). Gak semua orang bisa sekuat lo dan bisa survive in an amazing ways and had a remarkable achievements though you suffer a lot at those days, maybe still until now. Buat gue, gak pernah ada istilah product reject buat orang dengan kisah seperti lo. Kalo temen lo bilang itu adalah karunia, gue setuju, tapi istilah gue, itu adalah keunikan lo yang bisa membuat hidup lo jadi lebih seru (kan gue suka gak mo kalah sama temen-temen lo yang laen).

Pesen gue, go for something that make you feel an everlasting comfortable. Apapun pilihan lo, yang gue takutin cuma satu, kalo lo berhenti jujur dan berhenti cerita-cerita sama gue. It’s a great honor for me to be your friend. Hope I could be one of your greatest friends. Btw, lo kan suka bloon ye kalo gue pake bahasa inggris. Ni translationnya: Gue bangga jadi temen lo! (tetep kudu nyela!)

a tired smile

People said that if something doesn’t make me happy then I should just walk away from them. I do apply the proverbs in most of my activities but I don’t think that I have the option of not working. No matter horrible the job is.

Been moved to a new place, my second site of work. The name looks very promising. I bet that all people would know exactly what it is without many efforts to describe them (totally the contradiction of my first one). Also, most people (in certain age, though) would look very high of my line of work. Lastly, I also love the job.

However, still, things don’t always run smoothly. This working place of mine doesn’t even have post its, bad quality of PCs (while we forced to work in hurry where even a great PC sometime still making us stressful), the booths are very packed and got no private space, low salary, no insurance, killing working hours, undebatable bosses (they said that you have to make lots kiss ass), tiring (you should walk between office-studio-editing place on a hot sunny days or middle night like hundreds a day), and lots more.

But, kill me, but seeing smiles from my buddies when I could get them free CD or T shirt with a possibility to complete them with autograph from famous celebrities, or to have their shows aired, or to have premiere tickets to the cinema, or just simply to watch my shows which I damnly involved on every second of it, could erase all the hatred and make me smile, a tired smile.